HOLLYWOOD -- God bless America, and how's everybody?
Sarah Palin spoke at the GOP convention Wednesday amid partisan fever and tabloid frenzy over her family life. Every day it's a new revelation. It's hard to believe that after 16 years Hillary Clinton's been replaced by a younger, sexier lightning rod.
Palin made the cover of People and Us magazines Wednesday, which terrified the Democrats. Barack Obama just realized Americans have elected their last four presidents for their entertainment value. He just enrolled Joe Biden in clown college.
Palin was cheered at the GOP convention Wednesday. Her husband, her five kids, her pregnant daughter and the teen father were all there. They were guarded by the Secret Service despite the family's well-known aversion to using any protection.
Palin's Assembly of God pastor became a campaign issue on Sunday. He was taped preaching that critics of President Bush will go directly to hell. It's so cold in Alaska that his congregation rose as one and praised the name of Michael Moore.
Florida Congressman Robert Wexler called Sarah Palin a Nazi sympathizer Monday as Madonna was comparing John McCain to Hitler. Republicans are livid. There's no greater insult to the traditional values crowd than to compare them to a Broadway musical.
The GOP convention in St. Paul Tuesday focused on John McCain's life and his lifetime of service to the nation. His Vietnam War experience left him unalterably opposed to torture. It's why he refuses to watch videotape of himself giving speeches.
New Orleans evacuated 200,000 people before Hurricane Gustav made landfall Monday. Forty thousand extremely well-armed homeowners remained in the city. Thanks to all the preparation, the price of methamphetamine held at $10 a rock.
President Bush brought a ton of federal money to Louisiana Wednesday for storm victims. He's a man on a mission. President Bush's goal is to become so popular by Election Day that Barack Obama is reminding audiences that his father was a bushman.
Dick Cheney showed up in Azerbaijan and Ukraine Thursday. He wanted the former Soviet republics to know the U.S. stands with them in their conflict with Russia. Dick Cheney only has four months left in office and he wants his last war to be a good one.
Abu Dhabi's royal family said Thursday their sovereign wealth fund is going to spend $1 billion producing Hollywood movies. Don't ask what's in store for them. Let us just say it's fortunate they pray on their knees and not on their chairs.
Rap music mogul Sean Combs said Tuesday that jet fuel is so expensive he's had to ground his private jet and fly commercial. More and more celebrities are having to fly commercial. Mackenzie Phillips could give him some good tips on what not to pack.
America's Research Group said Monday that traditional back-to-school clothing sales were a bust for retailers last week. The back-to-school sales are bound to pick up after the GOP convention. All the girls are going to need maternity clothes.
The New York Post and the New York Daily News were camped out in Alaska Monday gathering every bit of gossip about Palin they can find. There's so much to cover. Right now Alex Rodriguez could date an underage stripper, bulk up on steroids and assassinate his bookie and no one in New York would hear about it for eight years.
Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. He can be reached for speaking engagements by e-mail at argus@argushamilton.com.
Opinion
Palin speaks amid tabloid frenzy
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Another Library Vote? Good grief!
Editor, The Transcript A new library on the west side? With hardly any books? With a dumb name above the entry as shown in your rendering? Infoplace? The library bureaucracy must think Norman voters just fell off the turnip truck....
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Show them some love
Oklahoma joins bus drivers and riders throughout the nation in the “Love the Bus” campaign to raise awareness and appreciation for the thousands of school bus drivers and aides who safely transport children to and from school each day....
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Eliminating state taxes places burden on poor
Editor, The Transcript: Your editorial on Feb. 8th that expressed your pleasure that the bill by Jim Wilson that would have removed the sales tax exemptions from newspapers was killed in committee was disconcerting. I can agree that the ...
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Not time to experiment with state taxes
Editor, The Transcript Governor Fallin proposed more cuts to the state income tax in her State of the State speech Feb. 6. This comes on the heels of a House Tax Reform Task Force that also proposed phasing out the state income tax over a ...
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Cuts in mental health short-sighted at best
When state budgets tightened up three legislative sessions ago, mental health and substance abuse treatment appropriations amounted to low-hanging fruit. It was easy for lawmakers to reduce treatment for mental health consumers and ...
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Local investment is better for Norman
Editor, The Transcript Americans from all walks of life and political ideologies are asserting their voice to tell Wall Street “Enough is enough!” Occupy Norman members spoke at the Dec. 13 Norman City Council meeting, urging the city to ...
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Decline in unions harmful to economy
Editor, The Transcript Remember sometimes you get what your ask for? Let’s see, what could that be? I know, destroy those evil unions which are compromised of the middle class....
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Tobacco ban comes as shock
Gov. Mary Fallin’s State of the State contained few surprises. The tobacco ban, however, came as a total shock to many legislators and state agency heads. “It was a surprise,” the governor told state press association members this week at ...
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‘Flavor of the month’
State Republicans have invited all of the GOP presidential candidates to Oklahoma. Former candidate Herman Cain came to Oklahoma City in early December, just days after he suspended his campaign. Rick Santorum brought his charged-up ...
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Gov. Fallin says tax cuts bring national attention
Rating agencies are often courted by state, county and local officials seeking better ratings and thus lower interest costs on long-term debt financed through bonds. Oklahoma’s governor and other officials called on various agencies this ...
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Another Library Vote? Good grief!
