The Norman Transcript

Opinion

July 27, 2010

Philosophical ponderings

NORMAN — This burning question has been puzzling philosophers, scientists, theologians and song lyricists for decades: Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?

The answer shall likely have to wait for the Supreme Court to weigh in. Meanwhile, I’ve got several more questions.

· Does anybody else feel like after his racist, xenophobic, anti-Semitic and misogynistic diatribes, it’s just impossible to enjoy any of Mel Gibson’s movies?

· Doesn’t the same go for the work of admitted rapist and pedophile Roman Polanski?

· Can anyone explain the adoration still exhibited toward the late Michael Jackson, despite his paying millions of dollars to little boys?

· What — or who — is a Lady Gaga?

· Are there any scientists more brilliant than those employed by Gillette company that charges so much for its Fusion razors?

How they can create blades that give you a wonderfully smooth first shave and still self-destruct so quickly that your fifth shave feels like you’re using sandpaper is a feat so impressive that you wish these guys were working for NASA.

· Why would anyone watch a pro soccer match on TV if there is a baseball game on at the same time?

· Did you notice that once the American soccer team lost to mighty Ghana in the World Cup, nobody was talking about soccer?

· How much time does President Barack Obama spend praying that Sarah Palin is the Republican nominee in 2012?

· What do I have to say to critics who predicted newspapers would be gone by now?

We’ll be around as long as there are folks who want a credible source for local news and reliable material for wrapping fish.

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